Uh oh. It's suddenly occured to me I'll be on a beach in a week. True, I booked the trip to Florida 2 months ago, and yes, that would have been a better time to start worrying about my bikini body than now. Obviously. But when it comes to my weight, rational thought is out the proverbial window.
Now that's not to say that I've been slacking. I've been going to the gym with acceptable regularity. And I've been closely monitoring every morsel of food that goes into my body.
Unfortunately, my careful monitoring has revealed a few too many morsels going in. Sometimes quite a few. Don't get me wrong. They're carefully chosen morsels. But there are too many. Things like raisins are fine in theory, not so fine in practice, when your practice is to return to the tin for another handful 6 or 7 times over the course of an episode of Grey's Anatomy.
And so, here I am a week away from wearing my new bikini. That's it right there. Cute, huh? That is not, alas, me in it. And so I have decided I have several options:
1. The Cabbage Soup Diet. I have to admit, I have actual done this. Of course, I've done just about everything you can think of in the name of losing that last 10 pounds, so why not live on cabbage soup for a week? No, it's not a long-term strategy, nor is it pleasant for those around you for a number of reasons, not the least of which is the inevitable crankiness associated with eating vegetable soup for breakfast, but it did get me into a bikini before a trip to Mexico a few years ago. But I would have had to have made the soup already to start tomorrow, so I think that's out.
2. I could eat nothing but celery for a week. That seems reasonable. Except I'll blow it at breakfast tomorrow.
3. Or, I could spend the week actually adhering to the clean eating philosophy I claim to follow but rarely do without cheating, step up my cardio to 45 minutes, every day this week, and lock the raisins in a hard-to-reach cupboard.
Damn I hate when logic wins out. It's going to be a long week.
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